Storm-An atmospheric disturbance manifested in strong winds accompanied by rain, snow, or other precipitation and often by thunder and lightning.
I know "calm before the storm" is just a saying, and the word storm stands for what is about to occur, but truth be told my life since my divorce has been a storm. There has been rain. There has been snow. There has been thunder and a lot of lightning. BUT, I have learned to dance in these weather conditions.
I know I am not perfect, I make mistakes. Since 2010 I have grown into the woman that I never knew I was. It hasn't been easy, and I have burned bridges and possibly have made a fool of myself along the way. I am a good mother, a good friend and a good daughter. Maybe one day I'll be a good girlfriend and eventually wife, but this has been the "selfish" phase in my life.
I have hurt men, although a huge percentage of them have well deserved it. I have put all of my faith into this TV show which means I have taken time away from my children to film. But, I spent ALL of my 20's with breast milk flying everywhere, changing dirty diapers and even though enjoying it all, this selfish phase I have been in has gotten me to where I am now. A cast member on a tv show on A&E.
People ask me all the time, "are you excited?" The best answer I have for them is "Yes, I am excited to see where it takes the kids and me." Being listed as a "celebrity" on TV Guide and other online sites is of course enticing, but it's more than that for me. I don't see it as being a "reality star" I see it as an opportunity to be a star to my children. Because the REALITY is, no man can provide for us the way that mommy should.
I don't know where any of this will lead us, but I can say that when my children watch me on tv (currently just the commercials) with excitement in their eyes, it is a reminder to me that we must take chances in life. I took a chance becoming a single mother of three children. This allowed me to run with the wind. And then I took a chance living with with my parents for stability while I was running through the stormy weather. You have two options when faced with a storm. 1. Let the world pass you by and settle for what seems to be the sunny weather. or, 2. dance in the rain.
Unless you are a single mother with three children, you have no idea what it is like. At one point I was a full time college student, BROKE, an unpaid intern and taking care of three kids, unmarried. All at once.
Looking back I never looked at it as a road block. Some women can't have children. Some women do not have the opportunity to go back to college, some women can't get an internship of her dreams.
I look at it as that was the luckiest time in my life.
It is never about WHERE YOU ARE GOING, it is about HOW YOU GET THERE.
So, please friends. Don't call me a "tv star," call me a mommy who took chances. Call me a Real Estate Broker who worked hard and sacrificed a lot to have the stars align for me. A woman who opens her mouth when it rains to feel the water, makes snow bunnies, stands by a tree when there is lightning, has her heart flutter when the thunder roars and most of all, dances in the rain with my children.
God bless you all and thank you for ALL of the support. After all, if this storm passes too quickly, I could be working at Sonic in a month ;-0
Now go out there and face YOUR storm, after all.....the weather is always unpredictable for us all.